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Entitlement Stinks!

When one of our sons was younger, he went through a stage where he became very entitled.  It was a challenging period for us because no matter what we did, he would feel that he was being grossly mistreated and lived with a sense of injustice.  He felt like everyone else was treated better than him.  A lot had to do with his behaviour and the consequences he was having to face, which for him, was further evidence that we were the “worst parents in the whole world”.I can’t re...

Little Boxes

The title 'little boxes' always makes me think of the song Little Boxes.  My favourite version is from Walk off the Earth. Video link below. You’re welcome. I digress… I am not a fan of little boxes; I am talking about the little boxes we create for ourselves and others.  So, when it came to looking for tools that could unlock people’s understanding of themselves and others, I have always been a huge fan of CliftonStrengths, I love this tool because it doesn’t put people i...

Leadership Lessons Amidst Disaster.

Where there is smoke, is there a fire?   I can’t help it; I see leadership lessons everywhere.  In every conversation, in every story. Isn’t it weird when disaster strikes, how curious we become about understanding what went wrong? I recently had a get-together with some business owners over a coffee and the conversation came around to the recent implosion of the Titan.  I really don’t know all the ins and outs because I actively avoid the news for the most pa...

Trust is not fluffy!

Trust is not fluffy! In fact, it is hard, which is why many avoid it.This month I want to dive into the remarkable benefits of vulnerability-based trust within your team and how it can unleash the power of authenticity. It is the foundation of any successful team, and by embracing vulnerability, we can foster deeper connections, enhance collaboration, and achieve extraordinary results. So, let's have a look at some of the advantages of vulnerability-based trust together!1.    ...

Riding Shotgun!

"Shotgun!" My boys used to yell this out as they elbowed each other to get to the front seat when we would leave in the morning for the school run.According to Wikipedia, "riding shotgun" was a phrase used to describe the bodyguard who rides alongside a stagecoach driver, typically armed with a break-action shotgun called a coach gun, to ward off bandits or hostiles. In modern use, it refers to the practice of sitting alongside the driver in a moving vehicle or giving support or aid to someone. ...

Building Leaders Today For The Future.

Parenting, like leadership is all about empowering and equipping people to take the lead.As a parent, you spend your whole life training your children up to be kind, considerate, fully functional adults. And at some point, you have to step aside and trust that everything you have imparted to them has been received, internalised and that you have done everything to set them up for success. You also have to trust that all your stuff up’s will strengthen them in ways that will be helpful and prod...

Set a Vision and Cast it!

I am not sure if it is cynicism or wisdom, but as each year goes by, I am less about the New Year resolution hype and more about value-driven goals.  I haven’t done New Year resolutions for at least a decade but spend time at the end and beginning of each year doing a process where I stop and take the time to acknowledge my successes and disappointments, and then seek out what I have learned from those experiences. I notice where I limit myself and create some guidelines to stop me f...

The Unseen Pain

I recently had a recurring pain which I have since learned is due to a severe sinus infection. I have had it before. It seems to hit me around October. This time it really hit me hard. I would describe the pain as having a hot poker stabbed into my face under my left eye and next to the nose, which is followed by pulsing electric shocks spreading up to my hairline and out to my ear. It is literally eye watering. It pops up randomly but chewing and talking can trigger it. Whic...

Drawing a line in the sand.

A point beyond which one will not go; a limit to what one will do or accept.Where is your line?Do you have one?Did you have one that has been blurred or rubbed out?Have you surrendered it?This blog is not informational it is conversational. It is an invitation to figure it out together.In a world that is becoming increasingly “anything goes” and yet “extremely polarised and rigid”, I have been struggling with where my lines are. And it has led me to take a step back to assess what m...

Playing it safe, isn't so safe.

Part of being a leader requires you to be open and ready for change and growth. As the world changes, leaders need to adjust and be prepared to lead others in that change. This requires us to be curious and to be open to making a mistake every now and then. The acid test is how you handle those moments. If we become defensive we close ourselves off to the lessons, but we also communicate that risking it is unsafe and that failing is shameful, this is not true. Failure is just feedback, stop...

Dying on the right hill.

We had an incident happen recently that had the potential to spiral into something nasty. Early this week I woke up to a very long and angry text involving my son and then a string of texts requiring me to “explain myself” from one of my neighbours who lives in our lane, they are relatively new, so apart from the odd smile and wave we haven’t really met them. I know enough that I didn’t want to try to clear it up over text so I tried to call, but the person wouldn’t take my cal...

Why is your WHY so important?

What makes you get up in the morning and do what you do?Why does your business exist?Why do you lead others?Why do we do the things we do? What would happen if your business ceased to exist tomorrow? Who would suffer because of that?These are some of the questions I have been thinking about this morning. Some of the work I do is helping people figure this out. The reason why this question is so important is if you don’t know the answer to it, you are likely to not have an anchor, a solid gr...

Accountability - the art of telling the truth in love.

I work with a lot of teams and the one thing most teams score the lowest in their team assessment is Accountability. It is especially hard in teams that like each other too. I have found that accountability can be misunderstood. I have seen it done badly with people being shamed into compliance, and I have also seen people getting away with behaviour that hurts the team and the organisation and the damage that does too. Accountability is an act of love, not only for that person but for the o...

Where do leaders go to find refuge?

Over the last few weeks I have sensed a battle weariness in leaders that I have come into contact with.  It has stirred a huge compassion in me. A lot of focus has been on making sure your employees are okay and it is super important, but who is looking out for the leader's who have had to carry not only their worries but the concern of their people too. It is easy to get grumpy about those who lead us when things are feeling hard, to demand care and concern from them, but wh...

Naked Leadership

Brené Brown frames a leader as "anyone who takes responsibility for finding the potential in people and processes and has the courage to develop that potential. Leadership is not about titles or the corner office. It's about the willingness to step up, put yourself out there, and lean into courage."  In her book Dare to Lead, she adds, "we desperately need more leaders who are committed to courageous, wholehearted leadership and who are self-aware enough to lead from their hearts, rather t...

Listen, tell, repeat!

This year is turning out to be a very interesting and rewarding year.  A few years ago, I paused to take some time to get clear on what type of work I wanted to do and what kinds of people and organisations I wanted to work with and how I wanted to work. I wasn't even sure if it was possible. I am starting to see the fruits of my labour and intentionand I love the people and companies I get to work with. Vision is so important, without one we lack clarity and this l...

Is Artificial Harmony slowing you down?

Conflict! There are very few people in the world that can honestly say they love conflict and spend their days seeking it out. Most of us just want to get along with others. In fact, we are trained by our parents and teachers to "just get along". Growing up, I had the odd "clip around the ear" for having a spat with my brother within earshot of my mum. I don't like to upset or hurt people and you don't need to if you do it right. I think it is because the word conflict for us has very negative...

The gift of the restart.

And just like that, we have just a few days to Christmas. Oh my goodness, what a year? To say we live in interesting times seems like an understatement. I am sure you are looking forward to downing tools and getting some much-needed downtime as the end of the year leaps towards us. I know I am.This year I did something different, I took a week at the end of November to take some time out to get my head around what 2022 will look like for me. I normally take a half-day to...

Is the Great Resignation really a thing in NZ?

There is a phrase being bandied about on LinkedIn and on global business platforms at the moment. So, I did some intense research, I asked Google, “Is the great resignation happening in…" well it seems that I am not the only one interested in that question. Apparently, people in Canada, UK and Australia have been asking the same question.What I do know from years of coaching and consultancy is that what people cite as reasons on paper are often only half the story. A...

Owning Your Superpower.

Every now and then, I bump up against that old Tall poppy syndrome. Knowing what I bring to the table helps me to stand strong. It also helps to have people in your life who don't let you play small and that call the greatness out of you. You know who you are ;-) I was on a call with a great leader yesterday and he pointed out something I do well, I followed it up with a very apologetic comment that it was"kinda my superpower". He called me out for not owning it. I so appreciated it. I repeated ...

Creativity as a Strategy!

I love what I do! I know, I am incredibly blessed, because lots of people don’t. They go to work and do a job, for some it  is just a way to pay the bills, for some it’s an awful experience they must endure. I feel like mine is an assignment, a calling. I love it so much, I don’t have an off button.  I have to force myself to switch off on the weekends. We do need to rest and when we don’t no matter how much fun we are having, our bodies have a way of letting u...

The Cost of Growth.

I was reminded of an interview this morning as I went for a walk to clear my head because I was feeling overwhelmed. It was with TD Jakes at the Global Leadership Summit. I remembered the conversation andI knew there would be something in there I would have probably missed before so I pulled it out to watch again when I got back from my walk.  In the interview, he is asked about a time he was speaking at a conference with the interviewer and came off the stage and apologise knowin...

The 3 Biases against Organisational Health.

Although I have used the models and tools for Organisational health for many more years than I have been a *CapaPro member, I have only recently been using them from “*soup to nuts” as The Table Group like to say.  Each model and tool, i.e. The 5 dysfunctions of a team or The Ideal Team player which are from books with the same names can be used as stand alone interventions with great success, but it has only been in the last two years that I have seen the power of using them as they we...

Is your organisation healthy?

So what exactly is a healthy organisation? Does it conjure up mental pictures of lean, muscular athletic people in an organisation?  Well, that is not what I am talking about.  I am talking about an organisation or business that is simply awesome to work at.  Where there is very little politicking, confusion and silo building going on, where there is a very low turnover and high productivity.  Where everyone in the organisation is super clear on what the mission of the busine...

Necessary Endings

Necessary endings. In a world that shouts with RA-RA music blaring, “Never give up!” It takes a lot of courage to end things. So we continue to beat the proverbial dead horse and continue to pour our most valuable resources into deep hungry holes in the insanity cycle. You know, doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result. My most dominant theme in CliftonStrengths is Positivity, which for me plays out in being the Hope bearer or the champion of hope. I ha...